DID PRINCE PHILIP HAVE MICHAEL JACKSON MURDERED?
There are unconfirmed reports that Harrods owner, Mohamed Al-Fayed, has alledged that Prince Philip had Michael Jackson murdered. Jackson, 50, was found dead at his rented home in Los Angeles, last Thursday.
Al-Fayed alledges that Michael Jackson was killed because he was 3 months pregnant with Prince Edward's child.
This latest Royal scandal(mainstream media likes to distract you to keep you from noticing the rich stealing your last penny from you) is enough even to make a Daily Express reader question their sanity.
There have been rumours for years that Prince Edward had been secretly seeing a gay lover, but there was always confusion amongst witnesses who saw the pair. Some say the lover was black, some say white and some even said the lover had no nose. There were rumours that the lover was always accompanied by a monkey.
Doubts over the cause of death remain, with some suggesting that Jackson was killed an angry descendant of the Elephant Man, whose bones Jackson purchased some years ago.
Only time will tell if Mohamed Al-Fayed is selling a load of old flannel, or if Prince Philip will be embroiled the scandal of the century.
CHOIR CENTRE ANGER
Drug addicts and alcoholics could be forced out of their church hall if a scheme to help a local choir is given the go-ahead. Llanelli Parish Hall is planning to lease it's premises to the Cor Mebion.
The hall will be used as a practice centre for the choir. Hall users are not happy about the idea and complain that the public have not been informed enough. A drug addict has told the Scar, "We are very unhappy about the idea. We were led to believe that we had the use of the hall until 2012. This will leave us without a meeting place. We will have to go back to meeting behind the garages in Station Road, again".
A resident who did not wished to be named, who we shall call, "Mr Clive Howells of 23 Thomas Street", said, "The choir are going to be based right in the centre of town. These singers shouldn't be put here. They should be looked after where they came from. There are perfectly good halls elsewhere, where they can sing to their heart's content without causing a nuisance".
Michelle Parry, director of Choirs Anonymous, said that it would be a, "Boost for the town. The centre will mean a place in which choir members can access services to gradually help them reduce their singing and hopefully give up altogether".
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MEMBERS OF PARLIAMENT
Thanks to GafaRafa for the GIF and Punditkitchen
UN PEACEKEEPERS TO BE SENT TO PENYFAN
 Secretary General of the United Nations , Ban Ki-moon, announced today that UN peacekeeping forces will be sent to Penyfan, in an attempt to quell the chaos that has engulfed the area, over the past few weeks.
The announcement comes after increasing fears that the situation is developing into an international flashpoint. The first batch of UN peacekeepers from Canada and the Ukraine, will arrive in Llanelli on the 15th of this month.
The troubles in Penyfan started when residents began to be increasingly pestered by various "clothes for charity" collectors. The collectors were accused of "flooding" the letter boxes, with charity bags. This action seemed to ignite long standing resentments between the population and the authorities, who they accuse of, "treating us like normal people".
Will UN intervention put an end to the disturbances? That remains debatable. As one UN spokesperson told the Scar, "I have not seen anything like it since the dark days in Beirut in 1984. I am not hopeful at all".
BOTH OF THESE GUYS WANT AMERICA TO FAIL
THANK YOU FOX NEWS
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